Your doctor will probably have told you to wait between four and six weeks before resuming sex with your partner. Whether you had a C-section or not, having intercourse immediately after labor, is probably not one of your priorities!

Vaginal stitches

Episiotomies, a vaginal cut practiced by the doctor during childbirth, in theory, to enable the baby to come out, are not common practice anymore. Yet, it is quite common during labor to suffer a tear in the vagina. These tears are closed with stitches which heal quite fast but might be a bit painful during the first few days. Six weeks after giving birth, you will see your doctor again, who will hopefully tell you that everything is OK and that you can go back to having regular intercourse again.

Once the stitches have fallen off and the area is healed, unless your doctor tells you otherwise, you will be able to resume sexual activity. Nevertheless, you may feel the area a bit sensitive or be afraid the wound might open up again. Although it’s not very likely, you must be the one who decides when you are ready have intercourse.

New ways of having sexual relations

Although your doctor might have told you to abstain from penetration for a few weeks, this doesn’t mean you can’t engage in other sexual practices with your partner, from caressing to oral sex.

On the other hand, if you are breastfeeding you might feel some tenderness in your breasts, or feel some discomfort in the area were you were given stitches, if you have sex in the usual positions. Try other postures to see if you feel more comfortable. This is the time where imagination may come in handy.

Nevertheless, if when you start having sex again you feel an unusual pain that you didn’t feel before, see your doctor to make sure everything is fine and that your internal structures haven’t been affected or injured due to a difficult labor.

Time for romance

The first few days after labor you might find it impossible to have time for anything other than taking care of your baby. Fortunately, as days go by, you will see that everything starts falling into place and you start to have a routine.

Nevertheless, the needs of the newborn may be very demanding and the household tasks may also accumulate to such an extent the first few days that it will be difficult for you to find time for romance. Although at first it might seem complicated, try to find some time even if it’s to watch a film together at home.

Everyone's relationship changes when a baby is born and it’s important to try to stay closely connected to your partner and avoid becoming distant. To have a romantic date with your partner, you don’t have to leave your house, or get a sitter for your baby. Take advantage of one of your baby’s naps or a time when your baby is quiet to prepare a romantic dinner (although it may only be lighting a candle and ordering pizza) and to chat and feel close to each other.